The nation's color-coded terror alert system will be gone next week. In its place will be what Homeland Security chief Janet Napolitano describes as a more efficient system that will issue specific alerts with expiration dates, reports the Wall Street Journal. DHS will issue the alerts via public announcements and social media. Threats will fall under two broad categories: "elevated," meaning a credible threat exists, and "imminent," meaning the threat is "credible, specific, and impending," explains Bloomberg. The old system "has faded in utility, except for late-night comics," said Napolitano. Generally, only two of the five colors were used, yellow for "elevated" and orange for "high." It got to red ("severe") once, and the two lowest colors of green and blue were never used. The website for the new National Terrorism Advisory System is here.

A new report on the most, and least stressful professions, showed that more than half of the 10 least-stressful jobs are in the health care, led by audiologists, who assess and treat hearing disorders. Other jobs in the field that fill the bill for low pressure and competition, with shorter work weeks, include dietitian, dental hygienist, speech pathologist, occupational therapist and chiropractor. Jobs in media, led by public relations executives, dominated the highest stress professions, according to the report, although commercial airline pilot topped the list. Other high-stress positions included senior corporate executive, advertising account executive, architect and stockbroker. Software engineer, computer programer and mathematician were all rated low-stress. Among so-called blue-collar jobs, firefighter, police officer and taxi driver topped the high-stress list, while jobs such as bookbinders, photo process workers, musical instrument repairers and auto assemblers are considered low-stress. Researchers compiled the ranking by analyzing 200 different jobs on their environment, competitiveness and risk. They assigned a numerical value to factors that invoked stress, and whether or not that factor was central to the job being evaluated.

The forecasts are out there about the death of Social Security and how Americans will likely have to work past 65 in the not-too-distant future. Don't sweat it, advises geriatrician Katherine Schlaerth in the Los Angeles Times. Generally speaking, people stay fitter, happier, and more mentally sharp when they work past the usual retirement age, she writes. Some people can't do it physically, of course, but for most, the benefits outweigh the costs. "I've come to believe that working longer is generally a good thing," writes Schlaerth, citing studies and anecdotal evidence from her own patients. "Most people just plain do better, both intellectually and physically, when they continue to work. I've observed many times that mature patients who quit working—whether they have been laid off or retired voluntarily—are likely to gain weight, become hypertensive, and even develop depression."

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Odor Tester

Think your job stinks? Try being an odor tester. These employees test the efficacy of deodorants and antiperspirants by sniffing subjects' armpits. Thanks to all of their nosing around, we're spared the results of faulty products.

IMAX Screen Cleaner

The magnificent, larger-than-life images on IMAX screens wouldn't be quite as powerful if they were cloaked in a layer of dirt and dust. Luckily, there are companies dedicated to keeping your viewing experience crystal clear. According to Michael Quaranto, cofounder of IMAX screen cleaning company 1570 Cinema Services, the biggest challenge to keeping the screens clean is making sure they're dust-free (they are so dusty, cleaners usually have to empty their vacuum two or three times per screen).

Professional Whistler

Believe it or not, you can make a living off whistling while you work. Just ask Henry Brady, a 58-year-old Welsh whistling performer. "A whistler is an artist just like an actor or musician," he told FOX News. "My profession has taken me across the world and allowed me to touch people's hearts." To be a professional whistler, not only do you need talent, Brady also stresses the importance of self-promotion.

Wrinkle Chaser

When you slip your feet into a brand-new pair of shoes, take a moment to admire their smooth, wrinkle-free design. Why? Because someone spent a lot of time making sure your footwear is crease-free. At shoe companies, it's a wrinkle chaser's job to use a special iron to ensure shoes are smooth as glass when they leave the factory.

Furniture Tester

If anyone's ever called you a couch potato before, he may have inadvertently been giving you career advice. Loungers actually get paid to test furniture for companies by sitting on it. Well, sitting and moving. They have to wriggle around, rock, lean back, lean forward and assess the overall level of comfort. Some positions even require furniture testers to try out 200 different pieces in a single day. So they can't get too comfortable.

Pet Food Taster

If pets could talk, people wouldn't have to taste-test cat and dog food. To make sure the flavors are just right, a group of adventurous eaters chow down on pet food, remarking on everything from texture to tartness. But they only go so far: Simon Allison, a senior food technologist for Marks & Spencer, admits to spitting out the pet food after tasting it and keeping a glass of water on hand to rinse with.

Golf Ball Diver

When golf balls are accidentally pitched into a course's water hazards, they're usually considered goners. But to people who salvage sunken golf balls for a living, those deep-sixed balls have dollar signs on them. There's a whole industry devoted to rescuing submerged golf balls and selling them "used" to golf courses. The golf courses like the discounted goods and SCUBA enthusiasts can rake in the dough—sometimes six figures, depending on where they're based.

Vomit Cleaner

An unfortunate side effect of a stomach-churning roller coaster ride is losing your lunch. And it happens so often that some theme parks employ cleaners specifically designated to mop up puke. You'd think it would turn the workers off the rides, but Rhys Owen, a vomit collector at Thorpe Park, a theme park in England, says, "I absolutely love roller coasters and the perk of being able to ride them for free makes [the job] worth it."

Fake Review Writer

Definitely unethical, but unfortunately some people make cash by writing fake reviews of businesses for companies that post on consumer-driven sites like Yelp, Citysearch and Urbanspoon. Their false enthusiasm for hotels, restaurants and products is meant to artificially boost ratings and slam the competition.

Gross Stunt Tester

How do shows like Survivor and Fear Factor avoid lawsuits when they make their contestants eat worms or swallow a cockroach? They employ gross stunt testers, of course. These brave souls prepare and then have to try out the night's challenge to make sure it's safe while still being gross.

Professional Sleeper

People addicted to the snooze button should consider pursuing a career in sleeping. Yes, you can actually get hired to work in your PJ's and catch some zzz's. Professional sleepers doze off for a living, usually as part of sleep research projects, to help scientists and doctors figure out the mysteries behind sleep disorders. Photo by Shutterstock.

Paper Towel Sniffer

Paper towel manufacturers prefer that their products be odorless before, during and after use. The only way to ensure a scent-free roll? By employing paper towel sniffers who let manufacturers know if their products harbor any unusual or noticeable scents.

Stanley Cup Keeper

Unlike other sports trophies, there's only one Stanley Cup. Each year's winning team and its players are engraved on it, but due to the trophy's high value, it must be chaperoned at all times while it's away from its permanent home, The Hockey Hall of Fame. So, a "Keeper of the Cup" is employed to accompany the trophy during its travels and make sure it doesn't get into any trouble.

Coconut Safety Engineer

In order to protect strolling guests from accidents on their walkways, many resorts employ people to pick ripe coconuts from palm trees before they fall. These coconut safety engineers have to shimmy up the tall tree trunks and dislodge the potentially dangerous fruit. An added perk? Free coconut juice.

Resort Waterslide Tester

Zipping down waterslides all day sure beats whiling away the hours in an office cube. Just ask Tommy Lynch, who was hired by British vacation company First Choice to check the height, speed, water quantity and landing as well as all safety aspects of their rides. Though it seems like all play and no work, Lynch takes his job seriously: "There is so much more that goes into the [slides] than people realize. The pools and slides are such an important part of the family holiday so it is vital everything is right," he told the Daily Mail.

Be in the right frame of mind

"My espresso machine is the most important gadget I have in the kitchen. If I don't have two double espressos to start the day, I'm not happy. You have to start the day out right."

Open the kitchen to guests

"If you have a kitchen which is open to the living room, obviously it makes life easier. But the main thing is that you have a few things ready in the kitchen on nice platters, or wooden boards -- even pizza paddles."

Dress it up a little

"You could even get pizza from the store. Cut them in wedges, grate some fresh parmesan with some sliced basil. People will say, 'This is nice, we want to eat this.' If it's plain, they'll say, 'This doesn't look right.'"

Cook what you know

"You have to learn a few things really well. It's always great to make a soup or stew because you can make it in advance. It makes life easier. Another great thing is to make little skewers -- chicken, lamb, scallops, whatever -- season them all a little differently, grill them and make a dipping sauce. It's easy, fast and you'll impress people with freshly cooked food. Plus it will smell up the whole room."

Cheat a little

"You have to cheat a little bit; it's OK. Start out with something you know and then get as much help as possible. Serve something you got at the take-out store, and something you made yourself. If you want to make a risotto, it's not complicated, but don't try to make the whole stock. Make one thing à la minute and have the rest ready."

Cook under pressure

"A pressure cooker is really great because you can make something in no time. Let's say you're an Irish guy and you want to make corned beef and cabbage. It takes five hours to make corned beef and cabbage. You can do it in a pressure cooker in an hour and a half or less. It makes things feasible. Pressure cookers are easy to use. You just throw everything in and what's really great is it seals the flavor. Lamb shanks are done in 45 minutes and they're moist and flavorful."

Use the right tools

"If you have a grill-griddle like I do, you can do so many things on it. And you can regulate the heat very easily [because it's electric]. So if you're going to sear a steak or a lamb chop you can put it at 450 and if you're going to make pancakes you can put it at 325 or 350. Whereas with the gas people are always nervous. It's too hot or not hot enough. It makes life much easier that way. You know you're not going to burn it."

A little freshness goes a long way

"You have to help yourself. If I would serve [pre-made] soup, I'd serve it in small cups. If you add some freshness to it like fresh basil or a little sour cream and then put it in a little cup, it gives it an extra dimension. Or just a drizzle of olive oil. Hide the can and say you did it all yourself."

Roast a prime rib

"At the end of the day, people will be impressed with what they taste. People will be impressed if you can roast a great prime rib. Chop some thyme, lots of black pepper. Make a nice crust and roast it perfectly and slice it -- people will think it's amazing. Do something for presentation. And it's easy to get a good piece of meat. If you want to get a good piece of fish, it's more delicate to cook and harder to find."

Simplify (but use fancy dishware)

"I remember one time, years ago, I did Christmas dinner at home. I had like 30 people, and I don't know why but I decided to make five courses. For one course everyone got half a lobster. So I brought 15 lobsters in the house. And you know, in the restaurant kitchen it's one thing -- it goes on the floor, somebody wipes it up. I was alone, I was cutting the lobster, juice was running all over the floor. I fell on the floor. Then I had to cook them all. It was a mess. Nobody could come in the kitchen. Next time I would make a lobster soup with extra lobster meat and serve it in an interesting bowl."

Whether it's an Army helmet with a thicker shell and better padding, or underwear that can protect a Marine private's privates, the U.S. military is looking at sending the latest gear to Afghanistan so the troops can come home safe. Next month, the Army is going to start sending the "ballistic boxers" to soldiers in Afghanistan, and the Marines intend for each of their troops there to have four pairs of the "protective undergarments," as they are formally known, before the end of the year. The heavy silk boxers, which look like shorts that professional cyclists wear, won't stop a bullet or shrapnel from an IED. But the silk can stop small projectiles like those kicked up by an explosion. "It is expected to prevent fine sands and particles that are thrown up by explosives, so that the tissue wounds are cleaner, less ragged and easier to treat," said Lt. Jamie Larson, a Marines Corps spokesperson. And since the silk is treated with antimicrobial agents, the boxers help protect injured troops from wound infections.

A Kentucky woman was charged with kidnapping and murder after turning up at a hospital with a newborn boy she claimed was hers. Suspicious staff called police, who determined that Kathy Michelle Coy had murdered a pregnant woman and cut the baby from her womb, AP reports. A detective testified yesterday that Coy, 33, told 21-year-old Jamie Stice they were going shopping for baby supplies but instead took her to a wooded area where she used a stun gun to subdue the pregnant woman before the murder. Coy took the victim's uterus, ovaries, and placenta with umbilical cord still attached to the hospital along with the baby. She had befriended Stice on Facebook several weeks earlier, claiming to be a relative of one of her friends, Stice's mother tells the Bowling Green Daily News. Coy has two teenage children, both of whom she asked for help in carrying out a murder earlier this month, the detective testified. She passed the request off as a joke when her children refused. The baby, named Isaiah, is still in a local hospital. "He's healthy, and that's a miracle, especially under the circumstances," said his father.

In a new report, scientists in Germany warn that compact fluorescent lamps (CFLs) emit carcinogenic chemicals and toxins—including phenol, naphthalene, and styrene—when turned on, resulting in what one scientists describes as "electrical smog." Because of that, they should be used "very economically" and "should not be used in unventilated areas and definitely not in the proximity of the head," he adds. British experts, however, say that more research is needed, and officials insist the bulbs are safe, the Telegraph reports. They do contain mercury, but in such a small amount that officials say it would be "unlikely to cause harm even if the lamp should be broken." The latest report follows claims from scientists and other organizations that the bulbs could contribute to higher breast cancer rates and cause skin problems or migraines. Click to read Rand Paul's beef with the bulbs, or for a funnier take, Colbert's opinion.

Scientists poring over satellite images and topographical charts have discovered a flood of new islands. A study has identified 657 new barrier islands around the world, bringing the total number of islands in the world to 2,149, LiveScience reports. Such islands tend to occur in chains, forming a series of small land masses parallel to coastlines as deposits of sand and sediment build up over time. Among the islands previously overlooked is a 54-island chain in Brazil stretching for hundreds of miles off the coast of a mangrove forest south of the Amazon river. Older satellite images didn't show a clear separation between the islands and mangrove. The researchers say their work will help identify barrier islands in danger of disappearing due to development and rising sea levels. A barrier island held in place by sea walls and jetties "essentially becomes a sitting duck unable to respond to the changes occurring around it," they warn.